james
Full Member
Posts: 62
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Post by james on Oct 19, 2005 4:51:56 GMT 4
Welcome to the stress free zone come on in express yourself have some fun.
Post your joke's here or share a lighter moment with a new thread in Lighter moments. relax enjoy, good day.
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Capitalism and Cows
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM -- You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
FRENCH CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon™ and market them world-wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION -- You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION -- You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.You charge others for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION -- You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
ENRON CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.
ARTHUR ANDERSON, LLC -- You have 2 cows. You shred all documents that Enron has any cows, take 2 cows from Enron for payment for consulting the cows, and attest that Enron has 9 cows.
Have a great day.
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Post by cgprox on Oct 21, 2005 7:25:53 GMT 4
OMG! This Is Me!
Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:
I decide to wash my car. As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the hall table. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the trash can under the table, and notice that the trash can is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is only one check left My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the coke a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye, they need to be watered. I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day: the car isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter, the flowers aren't watered, there is still only one check in my checkbook, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.
Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!
Growing older is mandatory Growing up is optional Laughing at your self Priceless.
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cmr
Junior Member
Posts: 25
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Post by cmr on Oct 23, 2005 4:21:43 GMT 4
First good, blonde joke I ever heard.
A lawyer and a blonde woman are sitting next to each other on a long flight from L.A. to New York. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game.
The blonde is tired and just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists, saying that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains how the game works: "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me, and vice versa. "Again, the blonde politely declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer figures that since his opponent is a blonde he will easily win the match, so he makes another offer. "Okay, how about this....if you don't know the answer you pay me only $5, but if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."
This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, she agrees.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a five dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it's the blonde's turn.
She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?"
The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. He taps into the Air-phone with his modem and searches the Net and even the Library of Congress.
Frustrated, he send e-mails to all his coworkers and friends he knows, all to no avail. After over an hour of searching for the answer he finally gives up. He wakes the blonde and hands her $500.
The blonde politely takes the $500 and turns away to get back to sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little frustrated, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"
Again without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D I'll edit in another one later. see ya
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cmr
Junior Member
Posts: 25
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Post by cmr on Oct 23, 2005 4:25:27 GMT 4
Here is a very good joke. One of my favorites ;D
A Letter From A Redneck Mother To Her Son
Dear Son,
I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved. Won't be able to send you the address as the last Arkansas family that lived here took the numbers with them for their house, so they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place has a washing machine. The first day I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain and haven't seen 'em since.
It only rained twice this week, three days the first time and four days the second time.
The coat you wanted me to send to you, Aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
We got a bill from the funeral home, and it said if we didn't make the final payment on Grandma's funderal bill, up she comes.
About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether if it is a boy or a girl so don't know if you are an Aunt or Uncle.
Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat. Some men tried to get him out, but he fought them off playfully, so he drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.
Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pickup. One was driving and the other two were in the back. The driver got out. He rolled down the window and swam to safery. The other 2 drowned. They couldn't get the tail gate down.
Not much more news this time. Nothing much happened. If you don't get this letter, please let me know and I will send another one.
Love, Ma
_____________________________________________
Bootcamp Letter to Folks:
Deer Ma & Pa,
I'm good. Hope y'all are. Tell brother Walt and cusin Elmer the Marine Corps beats workin for old man Minch at the Uvalde creosote plant by a dang mile. Tell 'em to join up quick afore maybe all of these heah places git filled.
I was a mite restless at first 'cause ya got to stay in bed from 10 at night till near 5 in the mornin, but am gettin so I likes to sleep late now.
Tell Walt & Elmer all ya do afore breakfas is smoothe yar cot an shine some thins. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay, chickens to mash and scratch, ner no rattlesnakes to kill. Practically nothin that looks like real work. An thar's plenty of hot waters all the day to warsh up'n, shower, shave, an ya got yar own persnal towel an soap!
Breakfast is strong on trimmins like juices, ceralls, eggs 'n bacon, an the like, but kinda weak on pok chops, taters, ham, chick'n fried steak, an other regular grub. The breads are poor an all dried out, an thar ain't no biscuts atall. But tell Walt & Elmer ya kin always sit atween two of thar city boys that live of'n coffee. Thar grub plus yo grub'll hold ya til 'bout noon, when ya gets fed agin. Then agin at ‘bout 5 thar’s a pretty fair supper awaitin for us. We doan have ta wait til nearly dark like ta home. An we doan have no more work after supper, ‘cept to clean ar boots an such for the next day.
It's a no wonder these city boys cain't walk much. We go on a thang the Sgt calls "Rout" marches. The Sgt says these long walks is s'pposed to harden us up. If'n he thanks so, tain't my place to be a tellin' him different. These here "rout marchin's" is about as fur as it is frum ar cabin to the mail-box down on county route 2 back home. Then them city guys gets sore feet and big ole blisters and we all have to ride back frum where we started in trucks.
The country round heah is nice, but awful crowded up - nothing like up in the hills ta home. The Sgt is like a schoolteacher. He nags some. The Cap'n is somethin like our school bord. Majors & Cornels just git drove around by some purty guy & look all mad. Not to worry none though, them big rank guys don't bother ya none, probly 'cuz they be mad at someones else.
This next will kill Walt & Elmer for sure now. I keep gettin fancy medals for shootin. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is nears big as a squirrel, it don't move, and it less'n a quarter mile away. And it ain't a shootin back at ya, like 'em thar Higgetts boys do ta home. All ya got to do is to lay there all comfortable like and hit it. Ya don't even load yor own cartridges. They comes to ya all polished up, a lined up in little paper boxes that ar packed up'n steel cans. 'magine that!
I got to do my first Guard Duty a couple of nights ago with a loaded rifle. Some guy tried to sneak up on me, but I heered him from away off and was a waiten fur 'em. I figgured he'd get a better lesson outta the butt kickin for his abein' sneaky than if'n I'd a just shot 'em. Been told that I gotta go talk with the Company's Commander about catching that sneaky guy t'other night. I bet I could git another shiny medal too. Somebody down ta the barraks said that there sneaky guy I nailed was somebody they calls Officer of the Day. Well, then he shouldn't a been a'poking around heah at night!
I'm surely thankful Uncle Wilbert was able to change that thar 6 to a 4 on the baptism paper, or I'd be near two full years too young to get in here. Tell ‘em I said Hey.
Be sure to tell Walt & Elmer to hurry & join up afore more fellers get awind of this soft setup and come stampedin on in.
Th'ar gonna pay us today - after only two weeks heah!
So I got to go along now. yo lovin daughter, Effy May Pvt USMC
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leon
Junior Member
Posts: 38
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Post by leon on Oct 23, 2005 9:43:49 GMT 4
Ok, who knows Homestarrunner? Strong Bad has a computer virus. It's just... Hilarious!! Well I think so anyhow. Take a gander at Stong Bad's e-mail. What happens to the characters is so funny. Me and the clowns at work, were watching it. We darn near died laughing. OK, take it away Strongbad LOL www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail118.html : Poor Strongbad's compy... you know... our local radio station uses Strong Bad's voice in commercials. Homestar is getting big.
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leon
Junior Member
Posts: 38
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Post by leon on Oct 23, 2005 10:09:01 GMT 4
Dead Horse Theory
The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that, "When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount."
However, in government, education, and in corporate America, more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:
1. Buying a stronger whip.
2. Changing riders.
3. Appointing a committee to study the horse.
4. Arranging to visit other countries to see how other cultures ride dead horses.
5. Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be included.
6. Reclassifying the dead horse as living-impaired.
7. Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.
8. Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.
9. Providing additional funding and/or training to increase dead horse's performance.
10. Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse's performance.
11. Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, carries lower overhead and therefore contributes substantially more to the bottom line of the economy than do some other horses.
12. Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses.
And of course....
13. Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position.
(Author unknown) ___________________________________________-
"Circle Flies"
A cowboy in Oklahoma got pulled over by a State Trooper for speeding.
The trooper started to lecture the cowboy about his speeding, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the cowboy feel uncomfortable.
Finally, the trooper got around to writing out the ticket. As he was doing that, he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head.
The cowboy said, "Having some problem with Circle flies there, are ya?"
The trooper stopped writing the ticket and said, "Well yeah, if that's what they are. I never heard of Circle flies."
So the cowboy says, "Well, circle flies are common on ranches. See, they're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse."
The trooper says, "Oh," and goes back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute, he stops and says, "Are you trying to call me a horse's rear end?"
The cowboy says, "Oh no, Trooper. I have too much respect for law enforcement to even think about calling you a horse's rear."
The trooper says, "Well that's a good thing," and goes back to writing the ticket.
After a long pause, the cowboy says, "Hard to fool them flies though."
(Author unknown)
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cmr
Junior Member
Posts: 25
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Post by cmr on Oct 29, 2005 4:20:54 GMT 4
Recently, The Washington Post printed an article explaining how the appliance manufacturers plan to drive consumers insane.
Of course, they don't SAY they want to drive us insane. What they SAY they want to do is have us live in homes where ''all appliances are on the Internet, sharing information'' and appliances will be ''smarter than most of their owners.'' For example, the article states, you would have a home where the dishwasher ''can be turned on from the office'' and the refrigerator ''knows when it's out of milk'' and the bathroom scale ``transmits your weight to the gym.''
I frankly wonder whether the appliance manufacturers, with all due respect, have been smoking crack. I mean, did they ever stop to ask themselves WHY a consumer, after loading a dishwasher, would go to the office to start it?
Would there be some kind of career benefit?
YOUR BOSS: What are you doing?
YOU (tapping computer keyboard): I'm starting my dishwasher!
YOUR BOSS: That's the kind of productivity we need around here!
YOU: Now I'm flushing the upstairs toilet!
Listen, appliance manufacturers: We don't NEED a dishwasher that we can communicate with from afar. If you want to improve our dishwashers, give us one that senses when people leave dirty dishes on the kitchen counter, and shouts at them: ``PUT THOSE DISHES IN THE DISHWASHER RIGHT NOW OR I'LL LEAK ALL OVER YOUR SHOES!''
Likewise, we don't need a refrigerator that knows when it's out of milk. We already have a foolproof system for determining if we're out of milk: We ask our wife. What we could use is a refrigerator that refuses to let us open its door when it senses that we are about to consume our fourth Jell-O Pudding Snack in two hours.
As for a scale that transmits our weight to the gym: Are they NUTS? We don't want our weight transmitted to our own EYEBALLS! What if the gym decided to transmit our weight to all these other appliances on the Internet? What if, God forbid, our refrigerator found out what our weight was? We'd never get the door open again!
But here is what really concerns me about these new ''smart'' appliances: Even if we like the features, we won't be able to use them. We can't use the appliance features we have NOW. I have a feature-packed telephone with 43 buttons, at least 20 of which I am afraid to touch. This phone probably can communicate with the dead, but I don't know how to operate it, just as I don't know how to operate my TV, which has features out the wazooty and requires THREE remote controls. One control (44 buttons) came with the TV; a second (39 buttons) came with the VCR; the third (37 buttons) was brought here by the cable-TV man, who apparently felt that I did not have enough buttons.
So when I want to watch TV, I'm confronted with a total of 120 buttons, identified by such helpful labels as PIP, MTS, DBS, F2, JUMP and BLANK.
There are three buttons labeled POWER, but there are times -- especially if my son and his friends, who are not afraid of features, have changed the settings -- when I honestly cannot figure out how to turn the TV on. I stand there, holding three remote controls, pressing buttons at random, until eventually I give up and go turn on the dishwasher. It has been, literally, years since I have successfully recorded a TV show. That is how ''smart'' my appliances have become.
And now the appliance manufacturers want to give us even MORE features. Do you know what this means? It means that some night you'll open the door of your ''smart'' refrigerator, looking for a beer, and you'll hear a pleasant, cheerful voice -- recorded by the same woman who informs you that Your Call Is Important when you call a business that does not wish to speak with you personally -- telling you: ''Your celery is limp.'' You will not know how your refrigerator knows this, and, what is worse, you will not know who else your refrigerator is telling about it (''Hey, Bob! I hear your celery is limp!'').
And if you want to try to make the refrigerator STOP, you'll have to decipher Owner's Manual instructions written by and for nuclear physicists (''To disable the Produce Crispness Monitoring feature, enter the Command Mode, then select the Edit function, then select Change Vegetable Defaults, then assume that Train A leaves Chicago traveling westbound at 47 miles per hour, while Train B...’’).
Is this the kind of future you want, consumers? Do you want appliances that are smarter than you? Of course not. Your appliances should be DUMBER than you, just like your furniture, your pets and your representatives in Congress. So I am urging you to let the appliance industry know, by phone, letter, fax and e-mail, that when it comes to ''smart'' appliances, you vote NO. You need to act quickly. Because while you're reading this, your microwave oven is voting YES.
BY DAVE BARRY
Found this at work, taped to the screen of a brand new, state of the art, no less. 'out of order'. RFID, Surveillance System.
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michelle
Administrator
I have broken any attachments I had to the Ascended Masters and their teachings; drains your chi!
Posts: 2,100
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Post by michelle on Apr 13, 2006 18:04:12 GMT 4
VIDEO: Cheney Loudly Booed During First Pitch Vice President Cheney threw out the ceremonial first pitch at the home opener of the Washington Nationals game today. The crowd was was less than thrilled to have him there, loudly booing over the Fox News reporter. (Note: Fox producers muted the crowd audio halfway through before letting viewers “listen in” after the pitch.) thinkprogress.org/2006/04/11/cheney-boo-baseballThe good news: Cheney’s pitch landed in the dirt, not in someone’s face.
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michelle
Administrator
I have broken any attachments I had to the Ascended Masters and their teachings; drains your chi!
Posts: 2,100
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Post by michelle on Sept 15, 2006 11:54:29 GMT 4
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michelle
Administrator
I have broken any attachments I had to the Ascended Masters and their teachings; drains your chi!
Posts: 2,100
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Post by michelle on Jan 11, 2007 12:36:02 GMT 4
How to handle a telemarketerHumor break at the FH Forum for a sometimes not so funny world: We all get them; those annoying calls from telemarketers who never give you a chance to speak. Instead of getting angry, here's a trick to turn the tables on them. THIS IS A MUST LISTEN; absolutely hilarious!....Michelle[/b][/color] howtoprankatelemarketer.ytmnd.com/
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Anwaar
Administrator
Speak the truth and keep on coming.
Posts: 463
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Post by Anwaar on Jan 27, 2007 20:58:02 GMT 4
At last, a bumper sticker for both parties.
FINALLY, someone has come out with a 100% bipartisan political bumper sticker. The hottest selling bumper sticker comes from New York state .
"RUN HILLARY RUN"
Democrats put it on the rear bumper.
Republicans put it on the front bumper
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Anwaar
Administrator
Speak the truth and keep on coming.
Posts: 463
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Post by Anwaar on Mar 27, 2007 4:37:37 GMT 4
A Guide to U.S. Newspapers
1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2. The New York Times is read by people who think they run the country.
3. The Washington Post is read by people who think they should run the country.
4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand the Washington Post. They do, however like the smog statistics shown in pie charts.
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country, if they could spare the time, and if they didn't have to leave L.A. to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country.
7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country, and don't really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's running the country either, as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure there is a country, or that anyone is running it; but whoever it is, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority, feministic atheist dwarfs, who also happen to be illegal aliens from ANY country or galaxy as long as they are democrats.
10. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country, but need the baseball scores.
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Anwaar
Administrator
Speak the truth and keep on coming.
Posts: 463
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Post by Anwaar on Mar 30, 2007 17:05:01 GMT 4
Man: Is there any way for long life? Dr: Get married. Man: Will it help? Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come. Why do couples hold hands during their wedding? It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins! Wife : Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband :Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes. It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives If u r married please ignore this msg, for everyone else: Happy Independence Day Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish. There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash. Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'? Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir. Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life! Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman? A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!
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michelle
Administrator
I have broken any attachments I had to the Ascended Masters and their teachings; drains your chi!
Posts: 2,100
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Post by michelle on Oct 6, 2007 5:53:07 GMT 4
"fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in th e rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt !"
- Amouynons
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michelle
Administrator
I have broken any attachments I had to the Ascended Masters and their teachings; drains your chi!
Posts: 2,100
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Post by michelle on Nov 20, 2007 6:31:05 GMT 4
TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!! First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking. As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pick-up on a warm day was always a special treat. We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this. We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank Kool-aid made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because, WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING! We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K. We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or chat rooms....... WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes. We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them! Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! If YOU are one of them CONGRATULATIONS! You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good . While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were. Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!
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